Patience and Mildness
- Problems are expected in every marriage so this is normal. What is wrong is excessive responses and magnifying problems until a marital breakdown.
- Anger should be shown when she exceeds the boundaries of Allah SWT, by delaying prayers, backbiting, watching prohibited scenes on TV, etc..
- Forgive the mistakes she does to you.
Correcting her Mistakes
- First, implicit and explicit advice several times.
- Then by turning your back to her in bed (displaying your feelings). Note that this does not include leaving the bedroom to another room, leaving the house to another place, or not talking with her.
- The last solution is lightly hitting (when allowable) her. In this case, the husband should consider the following:
a) He should know that sunnah is to avoid beating as the Prophet PBUH never beat a woman or a servant.
b) He should do it only in extreme cases of disobedience, e.g. refusing intercourse without cause frequently, constantly not praying on time, leaving the house for long periods of time without permission nor refusing to tell him where she had been, etc..
c) It should not be done except after having turned from her bed and discussing the matter with her as mentioned in Qur`an .
d) He should not hit her hard injuring her, or hit her on her face or on sensitive parts of her body.
e) He should avoid shaming her such as by hitting her with a shoe, etc.